Interview with the vampire ( movie review)

     Here it is, my dear readers. My very first movie review. And I choose you, Pikachu! I mean...I chose to talk about one of my favorite movies, Interview with the vampire. Why? Because it has it all. It's a movie after a great book, it has action, drama, horror, beautiful vampires. 

     Let's get started. I've seen this movie almost 100 times and it never gets old. I like how it starts, it gets you right into the action, no boring stuff. Just 3 little minutes to introduce the city of San Francisco. And that is ok, because it is beautiful. 

     The fun begins and you can hear Louis's voice that tells the geeky reporter "So you want me to tell you the story of my life". Oh, Louis...you are Brad Pitt. And we just love that about you. Of course we want to hear the story of your life. Even Daniel Molloy, the reporter is pretty cool. We have to give Christian Slater some credit for being a bad boy, but not in this movie. In this movie he seems geeky and naive. You should read the books, The Vampire Chronicles to find out more about his character. 

Louis de Pointe du Lac, beautiful and young Brad Pitt

     So they chit chat and then Louis tells the reporter that he needs to turn on the lights because yep, vampires don't hate the synthetic light or crucifixes. We can see Louis's beautiful Brad Pitt face. He has contacts lenses on to make his eyes green, because his eyes are blue and Tom Cruise wears blue contacts because he has green eyes. I just loved that. But I guess they didn't because Brad Pitt didn't like playing in this movie. Of course he didn't. He played this sissy vampire. He was just like the mistreated wife in an abusive relationship. In short, the bitch. 

     Louis whines about how he was all alone after he lost his wife and child. He drank a lot, played poker and went with hookers. He wanted to lose it all. He engaged in this self destructive behavior. He wanted to die. Sounds to me like a little emo? Oh, Louis...get over it. People go through rough times. Be a man. He sais he wanted to lose his wealth and estate. Great. Just hand the papers over to me and go be a happy hobo. Probably Lestat read his mind because he could do that and said: Hmm...he has a nice house and lots of cash. Daddy's gonna buy a new pair of satin underwear, yeah! 

     With the thought of living in a nice house with a beautiful emo male and slaves to feed on, Lestat went to Louis and offered him the "dark gift". Maybe he used NLP on him, maybe he was just charming but Louis accepted the offer. After all, he chose it. Why keep on whining? Lestat did give him the chance he never had.

Lestat de Lioncourt; Tom Cruise does a great job.

     So it was just the two of them. Like in Two and a half man. Lestat kills for fun, he feeds on the blood of women, men, etc. Louis is such a wuss and starts to regret his choice. He feeds on rats. So he really gives a rat's ass. Lestat doesn't and makes fun of him. Louis wants some answers and guidance but Lestat can't give him answers. He doesn't know them himself. 

     After he gets tired of eating rats, Louis goes and bites a little orphan girl, Claudia. Lestat is proud because he followed him and saw the whole scene. Louis runs away and goes to sob in the rain. He is depressed once again because he thinks he killed the little girl. Luckily, or not, Lestat takes Claudia and brings her to their house. Louis is happy to see her. But she is almost dying so Lestat has to turn her into a vampire. And she is just a child. And she will remain forever in a child's body. Oh well, it happens. To all the vampires out there, if you plan on coming to me and turn me into one of you please wait until I visit the gym a few times. I want to look fit if I'm going to live forever. Flabby vampires are a no-no. 

     So it seems like the three of them are one big happy family. Well, they are actually not. Louis is like a mommy for Claudia and Lestat is the cold and severe father. That is at the beginning. After Claudia matures into a woman but only mentally, because physically she is still in a kid's body she begins to feel frustrated and starts hating the two men. She is doomed to an existence of being a child. Well, that's not too bad. Kids nowadays look too mature for their age. It's because all of the chemicals in food.

Claudia, Louis, Lestat

     Claudia can't really hate Louis because she feels so connected to him. I mean, they shared the same coffin. And he is Brad Pitt. Who doesn't love him?

     The two ( Louis and Claudia) team up against Lestat, the abusive father/husband figure. Claudia feeds him dead blood and then cuts his throat.  Then, they put him in a body bag and throw him into the swamp.He comes back for them after he eats an alligator and other reptiles. But he lacks the energy to fight so the two set him on fire and leave him.

      Spidey's girlfriend and Brad then go on a cruise. Not on Tom Cruise because he was crispy striping, but on a cruise to find other vampires. They reach Paris and find Armand and his minions from the Theatre des vampires. Armand was sooooo attracted to Louis that he wanted him for himself. 

     When the vampires there discovered what Claudia had done, killing her maker, one of her kind...they punished her by leaving her in a cell where the sunlight killed her. Too bad she wasn't one of those sparkly vampires. :( 

     Louis is devastated and goes on a killing spree in the coven. Armand begs him to stay but Louis sais no and goes to live his emo life. He goes to the movies, hunts and whines. All alone. 

     One day, he goes to his old house in New Orleans and finds Lestat. He looks like crap and he's weakened. The poor guy had been cut, drowned, burned. He had some bad moments. We understand. He is happy to see Louis and tells him that it was a mistake to make Claudia one of them. Of course, he was jealous. They had a relationship going on there and the little girl ruined it with her feminine charms. Louis didn't stay too long. Probably because of the smell. Lestat, go take a shower. 

     Louis concludes the interview in his whiny and emo way by saying he is detached, unchangeable and empty. The foolish reporter is all enthusiastic about the story and doesn't want it to end. He tells Louis that he doesn't understand himself, that he can't be empty. He tels him that he thinks he brought him there for a reason, that he wants to make him a vampire. Louis gets all angry and starts to feed on him and asks him if he wants to die and if he likes to be food for the immortals. The poor bastard probably shits his pants and runs away  to his car screaming like a little girl. He puts on the tape with the interview and starts to listen to it. Then boom, Lestat makes an entrance, bites the guy and listens how Louis whines on tape and says that he had to listen to that for centuries. He tells Daniel " Don't be afraid. I'm gonna give you the choice...I never had." And the movie ends. Ta dam! 

     How would I rate such a movie? Let's see...so we have vampires which I love, we have action, a great story, we have beautiful male actors, we have Tom Cruise which is one of my favorite actors. I'm going to give it a 10, obviously.

     What do you guys think? Did you like this movie? Did you see it? If not, I am going to leave a link here for you guys to see it online. Have a great day and don't be a whiny vampire. Be a rockstar like Lestat. Have the attitude and never give up.