Bleached! Ep.1. Renji, the freeloader

      First of all let me tell you guys what this is all about. Back in the days when I was younger I joined an anime forum to do some research. Anyway...I ended up liking it there so I became a regular user and started having my own topics and so on. One day I decided to write a fan fiction about Bleach. And so I did. It was so funny and it was so enjoyable for me to write it but stupid me...I forgot to have a backup document and the forum closed and my work was lost forever. So...I decided to resurrect that fan fiction or at least something similar to it. So I give you Bleached!  Here...on Cory Kay Creations. Enjoy! 

Bleached! Episode 1. Renji, the freeloader

      It was a cold winter’s night at Urahara Kisuke’s house. He was baking some cookies with his girlfriend, Yoruichi and Renji was sitting around doing nothing as a freeloader would do.

-         Renji, what are your plans for this Christmas? Asks Urahara

-         Well…you know…whatever you guys like. I’m up for anything. Board games, drinking until we pass out, going to some clubs. I can even dress up like Santa and have a strip show for the ladies. Says Renji

-         What the hell are you talking about, you idiot? Yells Yoruichi

-         What do you mean, Yoruichi? Isn’t that a good plan? Asks Renji puzzled

-         No, it’s not. Me and Kisuke want to spend some quality time. Alone. Don’t you watch Two and a half men? You are just like Allen. Go and do something with someone else. I don’t mean to be a bitch, because basically I am a cat…but you do need to have a life of your own. Since you moved here you didn’t do anything to better your life.

-         Uhm…that’s harsh, Yoruichi. You know I’ve been depressed since Rukia went to New York to take those art lessons.

-         Go and hang out with Ichigo.

-         He’s busy with his training. He goes to the gym and when he is not at the gym he is at Inoue’s house…I can’t disturb them.

-         Oh, but you can disturb me and Kisuke, right? You are such an idiot, Renji. No wonder you were kicked out of Soul Society.

-         Wait a minute, cat lady! I wasn’t kicked out of Soul Society. You know damn well we are all here on missions.

-         Oh, and what is your mission? To be an annoying freeloader?

-         No, I am here to train and to become better so I can be a captain when Byakuya sama retires.

-         Oh, I see…and your training is watching TV all day and feeling sorry for yourself?

-         No…but…

-         No buts. After the holydays, me and Kisuke will be your personal trainers. You saw the wonders our training did for Ichigo. It’s your turn now.

-         Man, that sounds good. I feel just like a contestant in The Biggest Loser. You are like Jillian.

-         Why…thank you. I take that as a compliment. It means I’m fit.

-         Yeah, you are…you pussycat doll, you…

-         Abarai, do you want to see my bankai? Asks Urahara in a sarcastic voice

-         Well…sure…no one ever saw it before so yeah…

-         I mean…used on you if you make another lewd comment about my girlfriend.

-         No, man. We’re cool. I’ll listen to you guys. I will. I’ll put it on my New Year’s resolution.

Will Renji become the man he needs to become in order to be a captain in Soul Society? We will see in the next episode of Bleached!